{ william james }

I've been wanting to document the day of my little man's arrival before he even arrived, because I knew it would be something I never want to forget a single detail of. I realize the following may be way more information than most people want, but I figured I'd post it on here for those who may be into this sort of thing. It's long, but feel free to read if you feel so inclined!

A little background info: the day before my due date, I went in to my doctor's office feeling like I was doomed to be pregnant forever. My mom had to leave in a few days, so we were both getting panicked thinking she would miss the birth altogether and James and I would be on our own. During my exam, the doctor found that I was already 3cm dilated (10 is the max, for those who don't know) and 75% effaced--things were happening, I just hadn't noticed because I hadn't really felt any contractions yet. The doctor said that if the baby didn't come on his own before Saturday, we could go into the hospital and move things along ourselves a little. To be honest, I did not want to be induced. I wanted my baby to come all on his own, and the idea of forcing him out made me feel like the meanest mom in the world. However, my own mom was leaving on Tuesday, and the thought of surviving the first few days without her was even more terrifying. We all prayed and prayed that the baby would arrive on his own before Saturday, but the little man just wouldn't budge.

So, after one last baby-free night of sleep, James, my mom, and I arrived at the hospital at 8am on Saturday (July 12th) following a large feast of pancakes and bacon. The nurse let us choose which labor and delivery room we wanted because they were mostly empty. We picked a larger one with a nice view, and then I changed into a hospital gown and was strapped to some monitors. The monitor showed that I was actually having contractions, but they weren’t painful (I didn’t even know they were happening) and were still pretty irregular. Around 10am, my doctor came in and broke my water. They referred to the whole process as “labor augmentation” rather than “induction,” because (as I said before) I was already dilated and effaced, so they didn’t need to give me any drugs; they just broke my water to speed things up a little bit.

After that gush of warm fluid, things definitely started moving along. The contractions started getting painful and more regular, but still not totally even. They gave me the lowest dosage of pitocin to help things along, and by noon, those contractions were no joke. I dealt with them for as long as I could, but by around 2:30, the pain was too much. I had gone in feeling unsure about whether or not I wanted an epidural, but after dealing with the most intense contractions for about an hour, I caved in and got the drugs. I can honestly say I don’t regret it one bit! I could still feel everything and move around (to an extent), but the unbearable pain was gone. Right before the epidural, they examined me and said I was dilated to about a 5. Once the drugs set in, I was able to calm down and rest for a little bit, but about an hour afterward (just after 4:00), I started feeling intense pressure as if I had to use the bathroom. I mentioned it to the nurse, so she decided to examine me again even though it had only been an hour. She was shocked to discover that I was at a 9 and ready to push. That was not what I was expecting to hear. Things were moving so fast! My body started shaking uncontrollably, because I wasn’t mentally prepared to push so soon. James tried to hold me still and calm me down, but to no avail. No one was expecting this baby so soon—my doctor had even headed home for a little while! We waited about 15-20 minutes for him to come back, and then he examined me and affirmed that I was definitely ready to push. What the heck? I had been expecting to be there all night.

post-epidural relaxation

Around 5:00, I started pushing 3-4 times with every contraction. A few contractions later, my baby was out! He started crying as soon as his head was free, even though his body was still inside of me (haha, awkward..?). His little hand came out with his head, so the doctor reached in and pulled his whole arm out as I pushed him the rest of the way. At 5:24pm, my baby boy arrived! 7lbs 6oz, 20 3/4 inches long. I’ll never forget his adorable little high-pitched cries. Even the nurses said he had the cutest cry they had ever heard.

They wiped the baby down and then placed him right on my chest, where he immediately lifted his head up all by himself and looked into my eyes. He was perfect from the very start. It’s all still such a blur. The next half hour or so passed quickly as the doctor stitched me up, James held his son for the first time (I think I melted at that point), baby got his first bath, and they weighed and measured him. 

They soon moved us into a much smaller recovery room, where we stayed for the next 2 nights as we got to know our little boy. Oddly enough, he didn’t sleep at all for a good 4 hours after he was born; he just cried or looked around at everything. The most alert newborn I’ve ever seen! It didn’t take us long to figure out some of Mr. Will’s quirks. We soon learned that he absolutely hates having his diaper changed and being naked (although he's getting much better with these), and he adores being held and snuggled. During our stay in the hospital it was hard to even convince him to sleep without being held. James and I had to take turns sitting up and holding him while he slept, but we were so enamored with him that the lack of sleep wasn't unwelcome. It took us our entire hospital stay to make a final decision on his name (and I take full responsibility for that). I’m just no good at making decisions. Finally, the morning of our discharge, the lady from the birth certificate office called to ask for his name and I just made a decision on the spot. William James Pace! It was the name I had wanted all along, but it took that kind of last-minute pressure for me to finally make up my mind.

We got to take our little angel home on Monday afternoon and sat at home and just enjoyed him for the next week. My mom had to leave on Tuesday night, which was such a bummer, but we’re just grateful she was able to be here at all. I really can’t get enough of this baby boy! I could sit and just stare at him all day long. He’s too perfect! I can’t decide what I love most about him…his long, soft dirty blonde hair? His cute little nose? His kissable lips and cheeks? His smell? His tiny hands and feet? His wide, blue eyes? His squishy little ears? His sad little whimpering cries? The sweet facial expressions he makes? I could never choose! It’s all just so perfect.

James is so incredibly sweet with him. When I was in labor, the nurse said she had never seen a dad so excited to meet his baby. He absolutely dotes on little William and jumps at any opportunity to hold or kiss him. It’s so cute to watch him stare at and talk to his little boy. It all melts me! He’s already been pooped and peed on multiple times, and yet he still volunteers to change diapers. I have 2 perfect boys!

William is now 12 days old and is already growing way too fast! He was 7lbs 7oz at his 4 day-old appointment. This kid definitely loves to eat! I don’t want him to grow up so fast! I love how tiny and delicate he is now...but he’s probably going to be a chubster with how much he eats and sleeps. I better make sure to enjoy him while he’s still a tiny little snuggle bug, because heaven knows it won’t last long. I love this little boy more than I ever thought possible! My heart is so full. I feel like this is what I was made to do, and I honestly feel so fulfilled even as I sit here, covered in milk, counting dirty diapers and the minutes between feedings. Life is too good. Will really is such a sweet and easy baby, and he brings the sweetest spirit into our little home. I feel so blessed. I still can’t believe he’s ours!